I want to be like Eva when I grow up!
Eva Gilmour is a delightful lady who may just be the wisest woman I've ever met. Eva lives on the farm in Cherry Hill, NJ that she and her late husband, John developed back in the early 1900's. Now, nearly 98 years old, she enjoys weekends and summers in her beach home on the Jersey Shore, which is where we met her.
Eva Gilmour proudly sporting her GISA rainbow wristband!Eva's advice for longevity? "Keep moving!" Eva spent most of her life working hard on the farm, and she continues to stay active by walking everyday. In addition, Eva plays bridge with her friends and attends church at the United Methodist Church, where we spoke in Haddonfield, New Jersey.
Our friend, Sue Schantz brought us in to Haddonfield to speak at her UMC a couple of months ago, and when we were invited back to the east coast by Sodexho, we promptly called Sue, who then promptly invited us to a weekend at the Jersey Shore with she and Eva. Sue has known Eva since she was a child growing up, and they share a special love and bond that is evident to all.
When asked how she came to accept gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people, Eva replied, "I love people for who they are, and I judge people by their character, not by their sexual orientation or gender identity. Tell me, how do you feel about me as a heterosexual?" I replied, "Well, Eva, I don't quite understand, but I love you because you are a very kind, loving and compassionate woman." She said, "Well OK then, why can't that work both ways?" We all smiled.
Eva seemed to be quite perplexed by our stories of people not celebrating us, especially those who call themselves Christians. She said, "I just don't get it! How can people who call themselves Christians not accept, celebrate, and honor you and your relationship? That's not what Jesus was all about. He was about loving thy neighbor."
The more stories we shared with Eva, about many of our religious leaders, religious institutions and our families being unaccepting and unwelcoming of us as lesbians, the more appalled Eva became. So you see, we have not found age to be a barrier to understanding and embracing GLBT people! We do not deny that people of age were brought up in a very differnt era -- an era where most GLBT people were hidden--where society at large, and religious institutions did not accept homosexuality, and where many people really believed that homosexuality was a sin and a sickness that could be and should be treated and cured. (I know, as I write that, some are asking, "Has anything changed?") However, we know many people in their 70's, 80's and 90's who embrace us, and stand on the front lines with us for justice and equality. No one is ever too old to learn and grow. The question is, "Are you willing to embark on a journey of discovery, and are you willing and ready to shift and grow?"
Our friend, Sue Schantz brought us in to Haddonfield to speak at her UMC a couple of months ago, and when we were invited back to the east coast by Sodexho, we promptly called Sue, who then promptly invited us to a weekend at the Jersey Shore with she and Eva. Sue has known Eva since she was a child growing up, and they share a special love and bond that is evident to all.
When asked how she came to accept gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people, Eva replied, "I love people for who they are, and I judge people by their character, not by their sexual orientation or gender identity. Tell me, how do you feel about me as a heterosexual?" I replied, "Well, Eva, I don't quite understand, but I love you because you are a very kind, loving and compassionate woman." She said, "Well OK then, why can't that work both ways?" We all smiled.
Eva seemed to be quite perplexed by our stories of people not celebrating us, especially those who call themselves Christians. She said, "I just don't get it! How can people who call themselves Christians not accept, celebrate, and honor you and your relationship? That's not what Jesus was all about. He was about loving thy neighbor."
The more stories we shared with Eva, about many of our religious leaders, religious institutions and our families being unaccepting and unwelcoming of us as lesbians, the more appalled Eva became. So you see, we have not found age to be a barrier to understanding and embracing GLBT people! We do not deny that people of age were brought up in a very differnt era -- an era where most GLBT people were hidden--where society at large, and religious institutions did not accept homosexuality, and where many people really believed that homosexuality was a sin and a sickness that could be and should be treated and cured. (I know, as I write that, some are asking, "Has anything changed?") However, we know many people in their 70's, 80's and 90's who embrace us, and stand on the front lines with us for justice and equality. No one is ever too old to learn and grow. The question is, "Are you willing to embark on a journey of discovery, and are you willing and ready to shift and grow?"
Eva, Dotti, Roby & Sue at Eva's home on the Jersey ShoreWhile we were there, Dr. William Willimon, the Bishop of the North Alabama Conference of the United Methodist Church was speaking. We had the opportunity (actually, we MADE the opportunity) to speak with Dr. Willimon after the service, and Dotti was able to share her UMC experience with him (of being denied membership because she is lesbian). Dr. Willimon responded with stating he does not agree with disallowing GLBT people church membership.
In the evening, we were delighted by a concert of the Coral Ambassadors -- the youth choir of Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in Ft. Lauderdale, FL. When we were in Florida in February, we drove past Coral Ridge Church, and having heard Dr. D. James Kennedy speak on numerous occasions via TV and radio, we really wanted to attend a church service. We wrote about that in a newsletter. D. James Kennedy is well-known in mainline Christian church circles as being very unwelcoming to GLBT people, which is one reason we wanted to go... to be a loving presence and to put a face to "those gay people." What so impressed us, however, was the music! It was heavenly. Long story-short... Our friend Sue Schantz is close friends with the Coral Ridge music directors, Lisa & Jim Wilson, who served at Sue's UMC in Haddonfield for many years. We had the honor of meeting them, and enjoyed an amazing concert. In addition, we sent a personal letter to D. James Kennedy with Lisa Wilson to hand deliver. We hope to get a response, and will let you know when we do.
Song leaders, Jim & Lisa Wilson, Dotti, Sue, Roby & Eva at The Tabernacle
Since we last blogged, here is a snapshot of what we've been up to:
We flew to Washington DC on June 6th and settled into our home away from home at Mary & Allen DeLaney's in Herndon, VA. We spoke twice to Sodexho - once in Gaithersburg, MD and once in Allentown, PA. We marched in the DC Pride Parade. We spent time with PFLAG parents in Allentown. We spoke at a Mennonite Brethren Church where Roberta & Harold Kreider hosted us. We went to an HRC reception and met Joe Salomnese, of Human Rights Campaign. We spent a weekend at the Jersey Shore with our dear friend Sue Schantz and Eva. And now we're back in Herndon, sticking close to "home," doing some writing, some research, and relaxing before going to NYC this weekend for New York Pride, then we'll fly home on June 26th to start our "vacation." :)
Our first accident on the journey: I completely closed the electric car window on Dotti's finger last Friday at the beach. It was horrible, and very excrutiating. Dotti was in tears and nearly fainted from the pain, and I was in tears because I felt so badly. The finger has healed nicely, with only a light shade of purple left, which is pretty good after only a few days. We treated her aggressively within minutes of the injury, so aside from the color and some residual tenderness, all is well.
Dotti's squished finger after 2 daysIf you haven't already, please consider signing up for Lars Clausen's Page-A-Day -- His entire "Straight Into Gay America" book online. Each day you will be inspired and intrigued by this amazing man who was instrumental in our decision to embark on our Gay Into Straight America journey. Click on this link for Lars' book: http://www.straightintogayamerica.com/269.html
--Roby
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