Recent events cause deeper consideration

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Click here for our most recent podcast with Brian McNaught,dubbed the "Godfather of Gay Sensitivity Training," by the New York Times. I trained with him in 1999. He has been an inspiration and role model for me. You can also listen to the entire podcast with Lars Clausen, whose journey, Straight Into Gay America, was one of the catalysts for ours.

Recent events have caused us to consider the deeper issues in our society brought up by what has transpired with Ted Haggard. These deeper issues of "not living authentically" are borne out with the chain of events. Living authentically was the essence of our just completed year-long journey, Gay Into Straight America. We feel sad for him, and all those who have been impacted. His particular situation emphasizes the deeper problem in our society of denying parts of ourself that are not bad or shameful, but that have been taught to be so by some religious teachings. Rather than being empowered with living authentically, an essential component of being human and characteristic of all major faiths, we submerge our true selves (to please others and be who/what they want us to be). Then, we find ourselves speaking one way and behaving another, exposing ourselves by flying the red flag of one who "protests too loudly" in order to navigate away from truth. Our past history reminds us that there is a "Ted Haggard" in each of us.

Moving past the negative energy of judgment, we might look deeper to determine how our own past denials (about anything) might have contributed to the environment in our society where people such as Jim West (former mayor of Spokane who has since died), Jim McGreevey (fromer NJ governor who resigned), Mark Foley (who resigned from Congress), and Ted Haggard, were impacted by the climate we have all been a part of building each time we move further away from living as our authentic selves. How we do help those who have been impacted (on all sides), and help them to begin to heal and live authentic lives such as Jim McGreevey is now doing? True, he, like the others was "forced out," but should that be held against them? Unfortunately, the cost of internal homonegativity, still perpetuated in many ways in society, takes an inner toil against the spirit.

We might consider seeking a compassionate and forgiving stance (while still holding a person to accountability), rather than a judging stance, asking ourselves: "Have I ever had my words and actions not match?" And, "What was beneath the submersion of my authentic self?" The stuffing of our authentic self and not "speaking our truth" often leads to withdrawal of emotions, leading to numbing of self. This, in turn, often leads to inappropriate choices under the circumstances in order to feel relevant in our being. The cover-up and deception then has its own cost and consequences.

We encourage each of us to endeavor to lift up, not tear down, one another. Two Women & a Poodle are finally home, sleeping in our own bed! What a journey it continues to be. Dott Berry, Robynne Sapp, and Rylee Joy)...We look forward to hearing your comments ... GayIntoStraightAmerica