How it feels to be home after 7 months

Sitting in my swivel chair as I look into our back yard, it seems surreal that we have not been in our home for 7 months. I ask myself, “Have we really been to all of those places, connecting with all those wonderful diverse individuals?” Then I look at the huge map where we inserted the map pins last night, glance back through our newsletters, and I am overcome with emotion. Having been on the road with our year long journey, Gay Into Straight America, we have now “come home,” if only for a few days, to speak at PRIDE in Bellingham, WA.

Last night as we witnessed a beautiful sunset at the beach, five minutes from our home, Roby and I looked at one another, feeling a profound sense of connection. As we stood on this beach before we left, I snapped my fingers and said to her, “That’s how quick it will be until we are again standing on this beach. Let’s experience and be present to each moment on this journey.”

We worked all afternoon in the back yard, pulling eight 33 gallons bags of weeds. Today, the front yard! I realize how working in the yard and engaging with people keep me present to the moment. Both energize and empower me. When I don’t see the weeds, they don’t bother me or overwhelm me. They are like differences that separate us. Once I notice them, however, I want to get rid of them. When I see the weeds in the context of our beautiful yard, I can enjoy the process. When I simply listen and hear another’s story, the differences that separate us magically disappear, and allow me to experience their uniqueness.

As we hung the sculpture, called Deep Peace by the artist, representing the essence of our journey, Roby commented that we should call it Namaste. Indeed, the light in us honors the light in each of you on this journey with us.

-- Dotti

Many people are committed to changing our world!

I (Dotti) have been on the PFLAG Phoenix website, looking at times we will be in their area to see about speaking in August, after we leave New Mexico. I saw a link to this website www.CrossWalkAmerica.org and wanted to check it out. They are doing amazing things! I went to their blog, and saw the following blog from Scott, one of the walkers, as well as their documentary film makers. I want to share it because it illustrates so much of what our journey is about. Scott says, "This email is from someone I stayed with a couple weeks ago…I’ve cut it down a little for the blog, but left in the important stuff. I see this kind of contact an impact as a vital part of the mission and ministry of CrossWalk. As you read this, think of how many people my friend is speaking for in small towns - and big ones - all over the country. This is one expression of a story we are hearing over and over again.
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Wow! I read the first few blog entries today, and actually, I’m blown away. I know I shouldn’t be blown away…. I don’t discuss my beliefs with our congregation because I know that they believe that homosexuality is an abominable sin. However, so is eating unclean meat, according to the old testament. It puzzles me to no end that all these “Christians” can break the Ten Commandments over and over again, and still look down on people who are judged not to meet their standards. Doesn’t the new commandment in the NEW Testament from JESUS & GOD (since they are both one) Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and soul, AND YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF override the Old Testament…. it doesn’t say rich neighbor, or gay neighbor, or straight neighbor? Who are these churches to judge the gay community and not judge their own church members for adultery, judging others, “impure thoughts, eagerness for lustful pleasure, idolatry, spiritism (that is, encouraging the activity of demons), hatred, fighting, jealousy and anger, etc.”? **The reference here is to the quote sent to CrossWalk America in the letter from the minister at Jesus First church. See the blog - blog.crosswalkamerica.org/2006/05/23/what-is-your-response-to-the-surprising-new-twist-with-jesus-first-baptist-church/ - below. sg** It is ok for members of various congregations to come to church and worship and be used in your documentary while committing a few of the big 10 and many of the above mentioned, but since people are uncomfortable with same sex relationships, it’s ok to crucify those people. OK, this doesn’t sound very loving… I’m working on that. I just want you to know that MANY people stand behind what CrossWalk America is doing. Tell Eric that I’ve purchased 5 of his Phoenix Affirmation texts…. one for my spouse, and four others for friends who believe the way we do. Keep up the good work and keep loving like God loves us! Like I said, I have to work on that one!
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**I returned an email and asked if I could use this person’s comments on our blog site. sg**
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Yes, you can use my comments…. I guess I need to be anonymous since (list of negative things that could happen) if a few people really knew my beliefs. I’ve gotten in trouble for my open mindedness before. Sometimes though, I feel that I should just not care what people think…not care if they turn their backs on me, but I do have a family here. Perhaps soon, though. Everyone I know understands that I support you guys and your walk…. how daring! Some of us (in this town) are going to get together because we are in sync.
My spouse is having a bit of trouble understanding it all since being a new Christian and having great respect for our minister….as do I. But our minister isn’t God and there’s room for greater understanding. We have been reading the Phoenix Affirmations and discussing what we read in great length. It is so wonderful to read the words…. I believed these things since I was knee high to a grasshopper but just couldn’t explain why I believed as I did. Following is the reply Roby and I sent (we couldn't get it to post under "comments" to the particular blog, so we emailed them in hopes that they can get it to post.) Scott, we agree. The impact of this contact is vital to what you are doing. We want to encourage "anonymous" to reconsider, and Stand UP & Speak OUT. Audre Lorde said, "Your silence will not protect you." We are interconnected, and what affects one of us affects all of us. We have traveled all over the United States on our year long journey, Gay Into Straight America, having kicked off September 11, 2005. Our intention is to engage hearts and minds, create authentic connections, and dissolve differences that separate us. We realize that we can only do that by being our authentic selves. We tell each person we meet, "You can't hate someone whose story you know." If we are to change America, we must first transform ourselves. When we do, we offer a new space for others to evolve. Scott, thanks for offering that space to "anonymous." Gandhi said, "Be the change you wish the world to see." All of you who are walking with Cross Walk America...thanks for being that change! For "anonymous," If you are interested in discovering how to become a Stand UP Speak OUT Wind Changer, go to http://www.gayintostraightamerica.com/378.html. The quote by Helen Keller at the top of our website says, "I am only one. But still I am one. I cannot do everything. But still I can do something. I will not refuse to do the something I can do." That is why we, two women and a poodle, Dotti Berry, Robynne Sapp, and Rylee Joy, have taken this journey. We want to bridge the divide of polarization in our country. We were close to Pampa, Texas in November, 2005. We stopped in Amarillo to spend the night and have our car repaired. We have 3 signs on our car that say, "Two Women & a Poodle, www.GayIntoStraightAmerica.com" Having dared to be ourselves, speaking to groups all over the nation and having daily conversations with ANYBODY who wants to talk, we have received gestures on the road time and time again. You know what they are? People going by giving us a "thumbs up" sign, and shouting, "THANK YOU!" It doesn't matter if we are in California, Texas, or Alabama. On our journey, we have discovered that, more than anything, people in our country want to connect with one another. And yet, they often allow fear of other's differences to stop them. If each of us dares to reach across those invisible barriers, which we have envisioned as concrete, the connection is welcomed and leads to heart connections. People throughout history have needlessly suffered because we have been too afraid to "stand up and speak out" about injustice. May we Learn from history, rather than repeat history. Thank you Scott for what you are doing. Thank you "anonymous" for beginning to question. Our experience has been that, though it is possible that negative things COULD happen, the majority of fear is in our minds, manifesting all types of fearful situations and outcomes. “Anonymous,” we again encourage you to be the gift that you are by being your authentic self. With your wife being a new Christian, you have an opportunity today to model what that truly means. When we see bumper stickers that say, "Try Jesus," we feel a more appropriate one might be, "Try being like Jesus. "Anonymous," we would love to hear from you or anyone around the country. You can contact us at dotti@GayIntoStraightAmerica.com or roby@GayIntoStraightAmerica.com.

Home again, home again... jiggity-jig

Although our journey kicked off September 11, 2005, it has been 7 months on the road since we last saw our home. We were filled with emotion as we pulled into our driveway in Blaine, WA last night around 8pm. When we left for the open road on November 9th, 2005, we stopped for one "Last Supper" at Stanello's (our favorite pizza) in Bellingham. Last night, we made Stanello's our first stop coming back in.

When we pulled into the driveway, we were greeted with a Welcome Home balloon and a big pinwheel that our dear friends, Cathy, Ronna, and Shelly had brought to us for our arrival. We feel loved.

Did we ever leave? Were we even gone? Was that just a figment of our imagination? Where has the time gone? ...These are some of the thoughts/questions we have right now. We've started settling in at home, and we're all back in our little routines, such as Dotti bringing me coffee in the morning, and Rylee falling asleep beside our bed, then sometime during the night, going to her beloved crate.

Speaking of Rylee, it was so much fun to watch her as she leaped out of the car and spun around the driveway, ran into the garage, then into the house, and once she got in the house, she was doing flips, spins, leaps and laps like never before! To say that she was excited to be home is an understatement.

Dotti and I vowed not to spend our entire evening going through the HUGE pile of mail. Instead, we lit candles, put on some nice music, poured a glass of wine and just talked. We also enjoyed a dance before going to bed.

As I write this, Friday morning, we've had several knocks at the door from our dear neighbors coming to welcome us home. Our neighbors have been so gracious and generous with their time and labor, by collecting our mail, mowing the grass, pulling weeds, and caring for things on the inside. We appreciate every one of you, and feel so grateful to have such wonderful neighbors!

The yard is calling...
--Roby

Gay Into Straight America is heading home to speak.

Ok, we are going to get serious about blogging. Although we hooked up with blogger at the end of the year (after having trouble with another blogging site), we still didn't like the feel of our template. It seemed that we were simply so busy speaking, travelling, meeting people and making connections, and answering emails of people who contacted us, in addition to getting out our newsletter each week, that we had not taken the time to stop and figure out how to create a different look. Now we have!

We are heading home to speak at PRIDE in Bellingham. What an honor! How odd it will be to sleep in our own bed for a few days, before flying to the east coast, as we continue our year long Gay Into Straight America journey. Those 10 days in June, in the Washington D.C/Maryland/Pennsylvania area, will be the first time we will not have Rylee Joy with us on our journey. ):

We often meet people and discover connections in the most unusual settings. This past week in Port Angeles, WA, at Esprit Conference was no exception. Click here for the complete story.

On Tuesday, May 30, Mary Gallagher with the Bellingham Herald will be coming to our home to do a story about our journey. Stay tuned!

We are committed to Standing UP AND Speaking OUT as U.S. Senators contemplate writing discrimination into our constitution. The above link where you can click for the complete story takes you to our most recent newsletter, where you can discover ways to make a difference between now and June 5.